Volume 7 Number 1

From the Social Anxiety Institute

The Social Anxiety Mailing List

PLEASE NOTE:  Because this was published on the internet, we have omitted all e-mail addresses. 

The Social Anxiety Mailing List, which began in 1999, comes from The Social Anxiety Institute (SAI) in Phoenix. You can reach our home page here: http://www.socialanxietyinstitute.org/

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If you have a progress story or a question (small victories are wonderful to share with others) about overcoming social anxiety, please email the list at
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INTERNATIONAL CBT GROUPS AT SAI

March-April Group...

A June group is also scheduled...

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A Better Year

It has been several years since we first published this message, so I will send it out in hopes that it will start the new year off better for all our readers ...

1. Remember that work is not the only facet to your life.   In these demanding times, it’s easy to focus more on the workplace, but finding a time to "play" is just as important.  Making special time to enjoy interests, hobbies, and family, not only makes life happier, but helps us be more productive in every area of our lives.

2. Realize that you are just as important as other people -- and say "no" when your obligations and responsibilities are too much.  You can only spread yourself so thin before you’re no good for yourself or anyone else.

3. Don’t compare yourself to other people – anywhere or at any time.  When you compare yourself to other people, you always tend to see yourself on the "short end" of the stick.   You always judge other people to be better or farther ahead in life than you.  This is depressing to think about and tends to make us even more down and depressed.  Why do this to yourself?   Comparing ourselves to others is always a losing strategy and is never a good or helpful thing for you to do.

4. Make a scheduled time every day for relaxation and be consistent about it.

This is not a "lazy" relaxation, but a time when you regroup, let go of your stress, and read something that is positive and uplifting. This is a good time to go over any therapy that you’re working on.

Having a "relaxation" time or a "quiet time" every single day strengthens you, allows the stress and tension in your life to evaporate, and keeps you more on a positive, rational, and even keel.

5. Take time to laugh at yourself and the situations you find yourself in.  Laughter is a powerful, positive medicine and the calmer and more peaceful you can take things, the happier your life will be.   Anxiety cannot be present when you are really laughing.

6. Surround yourself with people who are positive, encouraging, and helpful. This has a nice reciprocal benefit: As you are positive and encouraging to others, your friends become positive and encouraging to you. We all need this continuing, positive encouragement to make solid progress in life.

7. If you have problems getting your feelings and opinions out, learn the techniques of self-assertion, rather than using anger or avoidance by bottling them all up inside.  Burying your feelings and pushing them deep down into yourself only creates blockages in your growth and progress as a human being.  It also makes you miserable.

8. Relax, calm down, take things slower. The cliché is passé, but there’s still a big element of truth to it: When you stop to smell the roses, the world is just a brighter, happier, and more beautiful place to live.

9.  Stop procrastinating and start working on an active, structured therapy program today.  You never get better by putting this off.  

10.  And, as usual, I must remind you that you CAN get better, you CAN learn to gradually reduce social anxiety symptoms, and you CAN recover from this condition altogether with patience and practice. 

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You can read many articles about social anxiety on the web site:
http://www.socialanxietyinstitute.org/articles.html